The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
God I need to hump something, right now.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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