I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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