i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
