I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Randomize