just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize