ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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