her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
