it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
handjob tips. give me some.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
