I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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