He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Randomize
