If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
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