I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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