She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
