Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize