Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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