God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
