I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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