It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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