Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
