sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize