it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
