fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
