OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
