so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize