just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
