he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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