Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I'm having to shit out rocks
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