Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
