This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
