google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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