she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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