Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
True college students do jello shots in the library
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
