Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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