he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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