This girl is more easily done than said...
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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