Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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