i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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