shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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