i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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