waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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