I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
