Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
and you fell through a lawn chair
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Randomize
