i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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