summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
