OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize