she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
