I wannas sexs uuuuu
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
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