I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
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