I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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