Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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