Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(260): View more from Indiana

We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.

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(561): View more from Florida

The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.

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(613): View more from Ontario

just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee

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(817): View more from Texas

Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.

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(519): View more from Ontario

I think he's speaking German to me now

(519): View more from Ontario

Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly

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(302): View more from Delaware

I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.

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(240): View more from Maryland

There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward

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(859): View more from Kentucky

There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.

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