Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
