you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
