He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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