does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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